In Other Words

Nonsense

Second day on MC (Medical Certificate, for the uninitiated (meaning you get off work sick, for the truly uninitiated)). Feeling better now, but that’s probably largely through the pills dissolving at the bottom of my stomach. Hope they aren’t taking part of my stomach with them.

I’ve got a couple of things to say, but I probably wont be able to remember them, now that I’m sitting here. Always think of things that I could write up here, but then when I get here I draw a blank. Blank mind, blank screen, that kind of thing.

First off, I’m now running an rpg online. Not that anybody would care, but I might as well mention it. Its going through the website http://www.grace_land.blogspot.com (so yeah, its another blog here) and its being played by a friend and myself.

Two, I don’t really like my job and should really start looking into finding something that requires slightly more mental activity. This might partially be due to my illness, though. I’m hoping it is. I’m hoping it wont be as bad when I go back tomorrow as I’m now expecting it to be. It just doesn’t feel very good, it’s not me, its not where I want to be. Its corporate and I’m just not, well, corporate. I can’t deal with this needing to get an MC when I’m ill, for instance. What, do they think I’m lying? I’ve now had to spend 50 bucks to get medicine, which I rather wouldn’t take, and take a number of hours where I could be resting, to run down to hospitals, so as to get a stupid little piece of paper that says ‘yes, he really is sick’.

I feel a bit pointless. The place is too big, yeah I’m doing something that could be important, but because there is so many people doing so many things, I can’t be very effective. There are constantly walls in the way, things that have to be worked around, people that have to be satisfied. We can’t do that because we would owe that department favours, we can’t do that because something else has to be done first, we can’t do that because this, that, thus and them.

I feel I don’t really want to learn anymore about it. That’s not like me, normally I have this thirst for knowledge, this desire to understand, I’m losing that here. I’m bored. Its not mentally engaging, its not what I want to do. Enough. I’m complaining again. Lets move onto something else. What ever that might be.

I think I better start sending out my CV again. Maybe see if I can find somebody else who needs somebody. I doubt it will work, seeing as I have no experience, but at least I can try to get something going on, somewhere else. Work on my CV, hope for the best.

Ok, I’m not enjoying writing this today, I’m far to negative, far to bleak. Hope its all the illness, try to talk again when I’m more upbeat.

posted by Symbol @ 8.6.04